From the funspot of Infowars comes some text from H.R. 3011 concerning the Transportation Security Administration “Department of Molestation”.
This bill contains language to prohibit the use of logos and words containing TSA, or variants thereof, and imitations of the logo design, and make such use a federal crime.
Apparently the extensive body of satire and parody of the TSA has hit some raw nerves.
The language exists in section 295 of the bill, so if you’re making money, or deriving amusement from making fun of the TSA, you had better write your congressman.
Some people who are unlucky in love have resorted to satisfying themselves with purchased services.
TSA now offers a service for those who like to expose themselves……. the full body scanner guarantees a captive audience.
Also there is the standard pat down for those who like a bit of light personal service.
A more vigorous form of stimulation is now available (since October) called the “resolution pat down” if one prefers heavier physical contact with more attention given to the private parts.
These services can be provided in conjunction with short flights for quite a bit less money than one might pay in the the urban areas for clean, professional stimulation.
These obvious facts point towards a tax payer supported industry which will service a regular clientele of fliers who OPT IN for special sexual services at BARGAIN rates. An airline ticket and a bit of metal apparel to ring the alarm are the only requirements for admission to the TSA Relaxation Center.
You didn’t think your taxes would be at work this way, DID you!?
It appears that the red-faced TSA will be investigating Johnny Edge, the now-famous blogger for his temerity in refusing to fly, because he did not need or want the above mentioned services.
Pharmer encourages John to monetize the blog, to raise funds for the fine, or for legal services he might engage in giving more publicity to the TSA “services” enumerated above.
